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All 4 game Reviews

Chibi Knight Chibi Knight

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars


Overall a well balanced game, and finally making children useful for something. Excellent work.

Ching Chong Beautiful Ching Chong Beautiful

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars

It was 1/2 good...

For the first half, and then I got to the next half and I tell you it all went to hell from there. First off I would like to know if difficult games are supposed to be the hip thing. I mean are they? They were back in the day, not in this day and age. Now we have all these kids(and adults) making games to be intentionally difficult. The only reason people dealt with it back then was because they had no choice other than to just stop. Or some other nonsense, I honestly don't care about that part. To all of you out there STOP MAKING DIFFICULT GAMES, IT ISN'T COOL ANYMORE. However, I digress, and would like to give reasoning to my complaints. The game is good... if you reduce the number of levels. Hurting that little guy was amusing as hell before, but when you end up doing the same thing over and over it gets irritating. Like daytime television, sure it's good for a while, but the same old grind really can get to you. Long story short, A SHORTER GAME WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE. Along with that there are some CLIPPING ISSUES, I was interested in seeing that little bastard getting crushed, so I tried standing in many NORMALLY crushing areas. Much to my dismay and delight, I was pushed ahead on the track. YOU SHOULD LOOK INTO THAT(CLIPPING). As well the area of effect those attack guys have(Like the ninjas, pop out walls, etc) is ridiculous, your timing has to be perfect for nearly everything in order to avoid, or you'll be sent sprawling to the beginning of the section due to criminal ghost effects. You and your character shouting eerily similar obscenities in unison. It makes me wonder if you planned that all along you cheeky bastard... So look into that too... (DAMAGE/AREA OF EFFECT) Another low blow, was having an easy mode that only allowed game play of half the game. Anyone who did that would have to start over from the beginning, and while I liked the game during that first half, replaying it wasn't as amusing. A simple warning would be sufficient. Sure most games don't tell you something like that, but it's not like you're trying to be like most games from what I can discern. So if you would kindly... (ADD A WARNING IN EASY SO AS TO NOTE THE GAME LOCKING) that would probably make things run more smoothly. You really put too much effort into the game length, if you had cut it in half, you would have had more time to note certain GLITCHES, and it would have been more easily enjoyable. Hell, the glitches didn't bother me until I had to deal with them for another whole half of the game, if you were lazy and didn't make as many levels, it probably wouldn't have effected the game play whatsoever. Level design could stand to be better, but that hardly stands out as a conflict, but combine that with glitches and it's hell on earth. That reminds me, since you seem to be aiming for retro difficulty, why not use the retro invulnerability, getting hit while helpless on the ground, knocking you back to start was a terrible idea as well. A few seconds of damage free would be a little fair. In other words... (MAKE DAMAGE=INVINCIBILITY FOR A FEW SECONDS) or (REMOVE DAMAGE EFFECTS WHILE ON GROUND) The water effects was a good touch, but amplifies the frustration. Sure it is a asianese game show, but what the heck is he running on that makes it so damn slippery? All of these really killed this game for me, I didn't bother getting past the last level as a result. To be fair, the art and sound was typical, so I have nothing to say about that. Also, I don't have Facebook, so I guess I'm a loser, and you're all fucked cause you're stuck with these glitches until someone who is totally cool by having Facebook messages what's his name.
BTW I sure as hell am not PMing this either, complaints don't come neatly wrapped on a silver platter you prick read it or don't.

PS) Blockhead is awesome, stick to animation, not games Swain.
PPS) Johnny Utah has an awesome voice
PPSS) Stamper has the word "stamp" in it

The-Swain responds:

He doesn't fall if you don't hold the run button. Try that.

Pilgrimage Pilgrimage

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars


This is two games, if you go all the way to the end and stop, then turn around, it's like a reverse, worst to best. It would have been better if you could just keep going after it got wretched, and it steadily got better quality. Well for lengthwise it would help. Otherwise turning around would suffice for this idea.

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Toss the Turtle Toss the Turtle

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Animal mutiliation...

But the good type involving high powered weapons, cannons, propulsion devices, and explosives. The AK-47 is the best weapon btw, has the most ammo and a single shot keeps the turtle fodder up. Kinda makes getting the rocket launcher disappointing though. =( Good game all the same.

Are you finished with the next turtle cannon game yet? xD